finally over this sickness

that was the worst week ever, but  i'm almost 100 %  now.  i still have one uncomfortable lung, but it doesn't feel like it's full of glass, maybe just bruised.  i weighed in at 139.7 on tuesday morning.   i never thought i'd be  under 140  ever,,  back up to 144 today..  being able to eat all my meals is a wonderful feeling.   

one year ago, i was 3 days away from "retiring" from  working for the man,, and going  full time as an  entertainer.    little  did i know i was  30 days away from a real life changer.    and what an adventure it's been. 

i sure bitched a lot on my blog here ,  but i checked my notes and didn't bitch or complain in person , at  home, at all ..   

i did have  a few  "poor me"  episodes,  a  cancer diagnosis &  mysteries can throw even a positive attitude in the crapper at times.

thanks  again to the food angel !!!!  just in time, again. 

the  summer  comedy drought is upon us.. what  does this  mean ?   ...  " comedy shows"  kind of  go away in the summer months,  the  sun is  still out till 9 :30 , people want to be outside as much as possible, and no one wants to  be inside at  8 pm ..  it's  just a  summer  fact..   

well , i 'm glad to have an air conditioned  job, at a place that just keeps  getting busier every year.   Not too many  work places that have that kind of growth  history..  

june is usually on of my favorite months,  and we're  just  hours away..   it's time to start everything over again.  no  gloom,  no doom,  no "what's gonna happen"  mystery, i  have  11  months  of data,with a  long life planned ahead.


health report 

attitude ................  good , looking bright
weight ..................  144. low but better than 139
strength................   96 %
overall score .........    8 .3

all this chatter went into space the other day. BOOM

when my blood panel  came back months ago, they warned me NOT to get sick, as my immune system is a bit weak.. , if we all remember i got super  sick in october and had to cancel  5 shows....  

tuesday , i started feeling crappy,,  most likely , microphone flu,,, comics  & entertainers from 100's  of miles  are spewing their germs on mics nationwide.. The Melody Inn has  action every night, so in just one week 96 different people might be unloading whatever they KNOW they  have,  or what the don't know they have .. it's just part of "entertainment".  i have my "own Mic" , but it's been at band  practice, shame on me...
  
wednesday..  i was certain i was in for a bad ride..  by wednesday night, after work,  i was grieving... total body aches, joint pain everywhere,  massive headache, no energy or strength --- i was sure i was  dying...  the cancer has  gone  &  got me !! .................i had the wildest  fever dreams ever , and woke up  feeling the worst EVER..   this is the first time i've felt bad  since  october .. and i was pretty scared.

thursday...  couldn't eat . or drink without throwing up instantly,  10 % of the exercise program, my head is exploding.. i'm coughing up orange ((  from the carrots? . or are my lungs bleeding ? )).. the achy joint pain has  gone to Def - Con 4.. and i have to  go to work.. at 10:30 am.. this is gonna suck big time... only small sips of water are staying down.. my eyes looked like i was tripping big time, & i couldn't  put basic thoughts together..    and the damn what if's start..    what if my brain is full of cancer,  all of my joints are full of cancer,  &  my lungs are full of cancer.  that's the only way someone can feel this shitty  for sure. NO  food and no pills= NO nutrients ,  and  off to work i go...    luckily ,i was able to leave , shortly after arriving. and was back  home by noon..  i choked  down 1/2 a meal , and as much water as i could  handle, and went to bed..  stayed in bed until friday am.     that's  minus  4 meals and all my suppliments , and no juice too,,  this is really bad.......     more crazy dreams..

friday ,, walking dead.. orange coughing again, my brain felt like it was wrapped in industrial twine. NO energy at all. but i am off , and can stay home in bed all day again... one meal near 6 pm,, no puking !!!  yippee ..   and finally was able to keep down some juice..   30 minutes later, i felt a tiny bit better, but back to bed till saturday morning...  that minus 4 meals again...  dying would have been a blessing, i was really hurting that bad...    and on my mind is Saturday night , the busiest day of the year for us, and it's my  shift. i'm doomed...  you can't call in on the busiest day of the year, are you kidding me..

 8  am   saturday.... i woke a little better, but maybe at 18 % of normal, i am seriously in trouble for the evening.. the food stayed down,  did 30% of exercises, and  had a full  load  of juice  & pills.... my brain is on fire, stayed in bed till 3 pm, got cleaned up , ate , went to work.........   i told the crew is was  sick as hell and they had  to all step up to the A game, as i was only able to help a little bit...  they did great, and i made  it to close = 12:30 am.. whew.. still sick , but improving.  but  back to work  at 10 am  sunday....... crap

sunday , today , i woke up hungry @ 8 am, what a wonderful feeling.
 ate the regular  breakfast, 100% of exercises, and juice. cancer take-over thoughts are gone..  back to work, INDY 500 day,, i just have to make it to 3 pm. i did  have a kinda "big" nosebleed out of nowhere, but it stopped in a few minutes 
 home at 3:40 ,, wow , what a week...  

now more  rest and LOTS of  food, and tonight , my first walk with the  dogs since monday,, lay in the yard chair inside,  and watch the 500..  i should be normal by monday night..


some of you were  thinking , go to the  doctor!!!  well , we all know  how i feel about that , and they would have told me to do what i did.. try to eat , rest, stay calm...   i shouldn't  have worked , but it did force me to  feel better , instead of staying  home and want to die.   

and that was my week,, how was  yours?   

    

fun night review

monday was my 11 years at the Melody Inn party .  it went fantastic. GIANT thanks to Janette Perez for getting it all together,, she fed everyone ,and had prize packs  for the Hoosier Comedy Awards..  i was lucky to win the "happening Host"  ,, the funniest part of the night was the otto impersonators.  i was holding my face on my skull i was laughing so hard.. Dave , who owns the Mel, was dressed to the tee with an STP jacket , glasses , and go-tee,, his  otto jokes we hilarious , the other comics were dying . Rick Garrett did a stellar  job, he had  a little table , set up as i was talking, spot on !!,, super cool bowling shirt,, we've done many shows together , so he  had me exact.. the crowd  went wild.. then Mansuper went  up ,, he looked just like me  10 years  ago..floral  hawiian shirt, goofy glasses, and was just a nut....  


a truly wonderful event !!!!

..tuesday  , i started  feeling sick.. microphone flu,, the worst sick you  can get.. 




i post about being sick tomorrow , if i make it..

longer than a week , slacker blogger

May  20th ,, where  have i been .. 

just trying to stay calm,  haven't  been super creative, and there's no amazing  cancer news,  and i must  confess to watching some TV..   i do play guitar at the same time , so it's not a total  loss..

tuesday nights have been band  practice,  we are getting super tight, my skills are getting  better also... 

the  Dave Dugan  show  at the  theater was  super amazing fun & fantastic  healing energy. 

i am very  happy about the  sunny  warm weather,, to  eat this  wonderful food in the   sun ... ka -Blam !!!  energy 

 like this mango ,  if you know  how to cut these, it's  quite a great deal.  it blows my mind  how cheap these are sometimes... and there's a mountain of them in costco..  

 i can get some  sun on my back , when i eat outside,, a good  20 minute shot.

  

some people  get mad about food pic's .     Chard, broccoli , tomatoes , quinua , potatoes, garlic,  coconut oil, lima beans, cucumbers , avocado.. organic chips.


tonight is my  11 years  aniversary show at the Melody inn,, monday  9 to midnight ,,  lots of  stuff happening ..


health report  -- 


i'm strong,  in no pain,   but  a little weak in the  brain. 



i stupidly  think about the wrong  things

7 days have passed

wow , a week zoomed by. i have nothing brilliant to add to your lives  today.

thank you  to the  food angel .  i walked in with with a bag of dimes  & quarters, so  you  saved me again 

i  am not on stage enough.  the energy received while performing lasts for 30 hours.  so  i  better  get  out a bit more............. 

here is a nice  show  you should try  to come to.. 

 

its a really nice theater show - rated PG 13,  all funny  !!!!!!!!!!!!!   , come relax in a nice comfy seat,  you  can even eat at the Mayberry Diner , before the show.

i've been  in the sun again, like May last year , but this time  i am not  filled with unknown thoughts of   my future, as i was gearing  up to retire.   

 now  i'm  like  a  vegetable junkie,, when is my next  meal..  do i have  enough juice  until tomorrow, and  will they have organic carrots ?  and  the  suppliments..  don't  want  to run  out of any of those..     well , good thing , consuming  this stuff is wonderful, no hangover, no shame.

my mind is getting better.   yippee 

health report...  

weight ..   147

attitude  ..  good +

strength ... added 50 reps to all  exercises

pain....  basically none

i've  been trying to  counting my blessings more aggressively ..  i have so much wonderful in my life.   my  "need"  list  short, and stuff gets crossed off pretty quickly.    i'm trying to stay  close to the present,   the past & future are unchangeable and unknown..     the  unknown sprouts   the what -ifs

here i am in the sun,, 15 lbs lighter than last year, a bit more  gray too. 

   we  got  new chairs this year

      

                                                               

10 month re-cap

10 months since diagnosis , and what  have i learned.....

positive energy is the key to recovery / healing

what you think, you become

some things  you  can't  do alone

my body is stronger than my mind  



.............................................................................................................

now  some blabbin'

physically , the last 10 months  have been great .   i  only  put  good stuff inside me ,  exercised and stretched .  i feel  way better than i ever have , and i'm in no pain...  not bad for a kid my age. 

mentally , what a nightmare. all self induced..   10 months ago  i was freakin out big time.  not because i thought i was gonna die, i thought  i was going to be in a lot of pain.   cancer spreads , your body hurts, i didn't want any of that.


so my mind trip , you couldn't see it on me.     i did  turn orange from the foods  & the sun,  other than that , i looked  better  quickly.   i  used the blog to unleash my  emotions .   if i tried to keep  all that crap inside , or to my self , i surely would have  crumbled into a poison soaked mess.        and  you   got to read all about it      

   the roller coaster  cancer puts you on is  terrifying ..    the clinky , ca-chunk of that slow uphill.. that's like seeing the doctors and doing research.      then the pause at the top,,    . and  release.....
       what's gonna happen ????...    and  i chose   the  "no seat-bar" car  , so to speak.   and yes,  the first hill , scary as hell..      each  dip  and  hill , loop , and tight turn was  another month gone, and i felt better, less scared . .      now , it's May ,, i feel like the coaster is  slowing down to stop.   i've got my hands  up , a big smile on my face..  almost thinking - that was fun.......              i'm gonna get off this scary ride,  and enjoy the rest  of the park...   but  i do have that snapshot of my face on that first hill,  it's not  laughing.....

what's  bad  about the coaster slowing to a stop , is ,  that a whole new load of people are going to get on. 

this  ride should have  been closed  50 years ago.................


and here's my new haircut..

  

                           i will have  gray side walls now 

ok , thanks  for playing along


    


 



 

another new month

may 1st ..  my sister Mary passed away in 2010.  i wrote about her before , it was her birthday in october.   She  had  lung cancer .    I would have to guess that when my family  heard i had cancer , they thought i was doomed. 

i gave myself a nice summer haircut today.   my hair is almost impossible  to mess up..  i can adjust it in a few days.  

last May 1st   i was   30 days from retiring,   starting the stress nightmare that  triggered my cancer.    today i was out in the  yard in the sun with the dogs.   i am expecting to start turning orange again soon , maybe not as bad as last year,  now that i'm 10 months into  juicing

my recent mind boggling battle is about  comedy, i   " got out of line "  so to speak, and had to stay  home  to beat cancer.. so i'm out of the  loop.   hence  not too many shows booked as of today, bummer 

 i do  really enjoy being home , it's really nice here. 
 the dogs are constant entertainment.    although i am the  ""asshole  with 2 pit-bulls""  when we  go walking.   i can feel the vibe from some of the people looking out their windows.    sometimes  Bella  & Zuzu  start fighting each other  on the walk, when they get crazy about  another dog...     then i know i can feel people thinking ---- --  { great- there's  douchy with the 2 dogs , and  NOW they are fighting }   oh  boy 

tomorrow is  10 months since diagnosis.. what a ride it's been ,,


no fears.. it's   a cake walk now